09 January 2008

Double 700C and Tonic

Just before Christmas, I found myself joining the staff of a bike shop for a Christmas night out. We started in a pub before moving on to a Chinese restaurant.

Early in the evening, the boss returned from the bar with a substantial round of drinks, and we started discussing the considerable mark-up placed on drinks by the licensed trade.

Tubes and Drinks
Later in the night, we somehow got onto the subject of how we could hardly judge - seeing bike shops have their own equivalent profit-maker: inner tubes.

Inner Tubes.


What followed was a boozy conversation which, though it seemed like a good idea at the time, is admittedly one of the geekiest in which I have ever played an active part. For some reason that I can't explain, it seemed a natural process to find an appropriate drink to match each of the inner tubes for sale in a bike shop.

I present below our reasoned findings, transcribed from the paper napkin upon which they were noted. Make of them what you will.

Inner Tube Drink
700 x 38C Schraeder White Wine
700 x 35C Presta Real Ale
20 x 2 Schraeder Vodka Red Bull
700 x 21C Presta Mineral Water
27 x 1 3/8 Tubular Red Wine
26 x 2 Schraeder Carling
26 x 2 Presta Becks
20 x 1 3/8 Schraeder
Vodka and Tonic
16 x 1 3/8 Schraeder
Tanqueray Gin and Tonic
29 x 2.2 Presta Single Malt Whisky
700C Cyclocross Tubular Sloe Gin
24 x 2.5 Schraeder Strongbow Cider
26 x 3 Schraeder Stella Artois Lager


Anonymous said...

The scary thing is that I can relate to that.


Clive Andrews said...

Any further suggestions, Neil?

Antoine said...

My 26x4.0 Presta would be a Youngs Double Chocolate Stout or a Guinness.

Clive Andrews said...

Thanks for reading!

If you'd like to comment further on this post, please go to its new home at cliveandrews.com